Baby Scissorhands

The one thing no one tells you about when you're pregnant is how often you're going to have to *try* to trim the baby's fingernails (AKA Talons). Not that this should be a reason to not have a baby, but you should make sure you've penciled in adequate time in your schedule for this activity... at least 5 hours a week should be good.  Yeah, yeah, I know, it's SOOO easy when they're babies and they just fall asleep in your arms and you can trim them while they're sleeping.  That only lasts about 2 months, then you're trying to wrestle them to get them cut, and when you finally get it all done and both you and baby are crying out of frustration, and three hours later you look at their fingers and all the whites have magically grown out again.

Or, you get them all cut and a few hours later, the little one grabs onto your neck skin and squeezes as hard as he can and you get pinched by the sharpened talons. Yes, you swear you got them all cut nicely, so either you missed one or the baby is hiding a nail file in the lining of his jail cell crib mattress.  I guess I need to do contraband searches of his room, although I'm sure our little Andy Dufresne is hiding all his goods behind his Elmo poster.

So, if anyone has any magic tricks for trimming baby nails, please share!  Until then, I'll continue to spend my days fighting with his little fists to keep them short and trying to explain the scratch marks all over my arms and neck.  Yes, the cat did it.  What cat? Yeah...

As for his toenails, I think we'll just start going for his place in the Guinness Book of World Records for longest toenails... But, do yourself a favor, don't go Google "World's Longest Nails" unless you want to be utterly grossed out.